Menopausal Woman of the Corn

October 2014: I am the root of all evil... err... stupidity

Yesterday, having yet another one of "those days" and feeling mighty dismal, I thought ordering a small gluten-free pizza might make the day brighter. It wasn't my first rodeo ordering pizza online, and twenty minutes later I rolled into the Domino's parking lot ready to sink my teeth into something warm and cheesy.

And so it began...

The employees at Domino's had no record of my order and asked me for my phone number so they could verify it. That was the first issue, as my memory since the stroke is awful, but luckily I put my new phone number in 'contacts' as darned if I can remember it. The second issue was trying to focus on anything with my new long distance/bifocal glasses. After fiddling around for a good few minutes I recited the number and, of course, they had no record of it. The staff was quite kind and quickly offered to make me one, but after the day I had I felt like everyone including Domino's Pizza was out to get me.

Upon arriving home I checked my email and sure enough the order was there, so I Skyped a friend looking for some pepperoni support. He immediately told me it is just a pizza and to go back and demand a free one. We both agreed that I should not take it out on the acne-ridden high school staff as that is just not fair. I forwarded my order to Gmail as I cannot pull anything up my Yahoo mail on my cellphone as "the powers that be" want me to do something with my browser — and that my friends, is way beyond my knowledge.

I walked into Domino's, showed them the confirmed order on my cellphone, and the cashier said, "well, your first problem is that you ordered it from Pizza Pizza and not Domino's." I smacked my head and said, "I am such a moron and am so sorry for wasting your time." I crossed the street, picked up my pizza at Pizza Pizza, and wondered if I should just cry or get a 2-for-1 lobotomy.

Why me?

Oh, why not?

Solomon Short once said that being smart is knowing what you are dumb about. Heck, I must be quite the Einstein!

Or not.